Stage Two - Days 29 & 30 - Sorting

I'm once again heading into the last ten days of my 40 Days To Life. A good, productive day Monday, and a bit of a cluster yesterday. The frustration of yesterday came from the need to change things around because of medical appointments and logistical frustrations. What it meant, as it seems to mean every time, was a discombobulated feeling of disorientation that left the day a struggle to get through.

The day ended well though, with a glass of wine and a Caprese salad first and then a terrific port tasting at Sonoma Valley Port Works... Ahhhh... the advantages of wine country.

Today begins things again and a good morning sitting with Merton and Thurman helps (as it always does).

Me reading in Howard Thurman this morning reminded me that times like meditation and sitting (and I would add walks and physical exercise) are the prep work for hearing the spirit. They don't in any way guarantee that the spirit will arrive (or when) but they are the ground work that enables us to be, at least a little bit, more ready when the time comes.

I'd have to add that this is about the same reality with this whole idea of 40 Days To Life. Over the last nearly three months, and two trips around the wheel, while I have achieved many of the goals I had in mind at the beginning, I have also left many sitting on the table waiting patiently to be taken up. The most important element of the process has been the ongoing, intentional, cultivation of daily awareness. A practice of being awake.

By setting up - and at various intervals reconsidering and altering - a specific plan, clear goals, and a structure (namely this blog among other things) for keeping myself accountable, I have moved myself further along the road I want to walk. This is kind of surprising to me, because at 54, and with virtually 40 years of medtation, study and practice behind me, I pretty much thought that I was supremely prepared for anything. Not true. While I expect that at some point along the path I was traveling I would have accomplished most of what has transpired over the last 70 days, I am certain that it would not have happened as quickly or with as much awareness of the process.

Taking the time to pay attention, and to relate to others what that attention has revealed (and continues to reveal) has made it easier to accomplish what I want, has made the process easier, and has helped keep me focused on the tasks... and my life.

If the unexamined life is not worth living, a process like this certainly helps prevent one's premature demise.