This morning, I started the morning and the week in a low energy lethargy that I found myself battling in one of those brain fights that are forced on me from time to time. Battles that sometimes I win and most times I lose. When I turned on the iTunes and caught the Melissa Ethridge song "Run for Life," the song she recorded after her battle with breast cancer and her declaration of solidarity and purpose in the struggle against cancer, I thought of friends and loved ones who have had the disease in one form or another and who have both died from it and battled it back to a thriving life, I was laid sideways by a HUNGER for something more than the every day meandering that takes up most of my time.
Paul Newman's death this weekend went by very quietly in the midst of all the other things that I was doing. I heard a brief bit of an interview with him on the radio and I read bits and pieces in passing as I glanced at one newspaper article or another. The thing that I was most taken by was the way he latched on to living and held it. Whether acting, in his marriage to Joanne Woodward, at his camps for kids, as a race car driver, a gastronomical entrepeneur, or just as a good and decent human being, Newman LIVED.
More than anything, THIS is what I am seeking to gain in the remaining three weeks of this 40 Day plan. This is "the bliss" that Campbell talks about.
I want to find MY way back to real life again. I want to know the passion that, at one time, I felt every morning, and that I so deeply desire to feel again. I want to find the energy, the focus, and the intention to get up every morning and pursue THAT each day... EVERY DAY.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Day 20 & 21 - Still Learning to Rest
I've never been particularly good at settling down and resting. There is a family anecdote that has been repeated often throughout my life that describes how my parents could never get me to rest as a kid, could never get me to lie down for a nap, or stay in bed beyond sunrise in the morning.
This is a behavior that, for the most part, remains in my DNA. Whether it's an evening of sitting around and reading, or a Saturday at the beach, or a weekend away (let alone something longer, like a week), if I don't have something to do, something that gets me moving and occupies my brain, something (often related to a computer unfortunately) that lets me feel productive even if it's actually having the opposite effect, I tend to be jumpy, nervous and scattered.
This weekend was an ongoing attempt, partly successful and partly not so much, at settling into rest mode. I spent time at a couple of soccer matches, did some shopping, some cooking, a little bit of reading, but still on both Saturday and Sunday I found it necessary to move to the electronic vortex and twiddle the keys.
One of the greatest lessons for me in this 40 Days is the need for downtime. My goal is to set Saturdays aside for some rest and some work (most particularly writing), a day for catching up AND settling down, with Sundays dedicated completely to rest, and rejuvenation (physical, mental and spiritual). In my wildest imagination I don't even look at a computer on Sunday, I take a "digital sabbath."
Like most of the other goals in the plan... I am definitely getting better at this... but I'm definitely not there yet.
This is a behavior that, for the most part, remains in my DNA. Whether it's an evening of sitting around and reading, or a Saturday at the beach, or a weekend away (let alone something longer, like a week), if I don't have something to do, something that gets me moving and occupies my brain, something (often related to a computer unfortunately) that lets me feel productive even if it's actually having the opposite effect, I tend to be jumpy, nervous and scattered.
This weekend was an ongoing attempt, partly successful and partly not so much, at settling into rest mode. I spent time at a couple of soccer matches, did some shopping, some cooking, a little bit of reading, but still on both Saturday and Sunday I found it necessary to move to the electronic vortex and twiddle the keys.
One of the greatest lessons for me in this 40 Days is the need for downtime. My goal is to set Saturdays aside for some rest and some work (most particularly writing), a day for catching up AND settling down, with Sundays dedicated completely to rest, and rejuvenation (physical, mental and spiritual). In my wildest imagination I don't even look at a computer on Sunday, I take a "digital sabbath."
Like most of the other goals in the plan... I am definitely getting better at this... but I'm definitely not there yet.
Friday, September 26, 2008
Day 19 - Halfway Home
Today is the last day of the first half of the 40 days. Tomorrow is the actual halfway point, but considering that my goal arrives three weeks from today, it seems worthwhile in my mind,such as it is, to place myself at the center of the line today.
So where am I?
What have I accomplished... what have I done well... What needs work... What is left to be done?
• I have made great progress on the underlying groundwork for what I want. My personal schedule and my basic discipline at maintaining it is the best it's been in a long time, maybe better than I've ever been.
• I have picked up certain disciplines and behaviors (a regulation on how and when I get email, talk on the phone, write, read, workout, etc.) that are necessary for keeping things moving forward. These are the kinds of things that don't seem like a big deal to people who have to go into the office every day, but when, like me, you've worked on your own schedule in your own way for 30 years it can be very easy to lose that disciplined structure and lose the benefits that such structure provides. I haven't succeeded at dialing this in completely (as can be seen from my last two days of posts) but I'm getting close. I am, however, picking up that "Creative Habit" that Twyla Tharpe talks about.
• I have, on some level, at least begun about 90% of the goals I set up on my list. I expect to nail down the rest of them by the beginning of next week. That gives me the last half of this program to target myself full speed ahead.
• I have learned that it is ALL in your mind.
What I have not figured out is how to balance it all. How do you keep the plates spinning AND live a light hearted, conscious life?
Hopefully I will discover that somewhere in the remaining 21 days.
So where am I?
What have I accomplished... what have I done well... What needs work... What is left to be done?
• I have made great progress on the underlying groundwork for what I want. My personal schedule and my basic discipline at maintaining it is the best it's been in a long time, maybe better than I've ever been.
• I have picked up certain disciplines and behaviors (a regulation on how and when I get email, talk on the phone, write, read, workout, etc.) that are necessary for keeping things moving forward. These are the kinds of things that don't seem like a big deal to people who have to go into the office every day, but when, like me, you've worked on your own schedule in your own way for 30 years it can be very easy to lose that disciplined structure and lose the benefits that such structure provides. I haven't succeeded at dialing this in completely (as can be seen from my last two days of posts) but I'm getting close. I am, however, picking up that "Creative Habit" that Twyla Tharpe talks about.
• I have, on some level, at least begun about 90% of the goals I set up on my list. I expect to nail down the rest of them by the beginning of next week. That gives me the last half of this program to target myself full speed ahead.
• I have learned that it is ALL in your mind.
What I have not figured out is how to balance it all. How do you keep the plates spinning AND live a light hearted, conscious life?
Hopefully I will discover that somewhere in the remaining 21 days.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Day 18 - Living in The Vortex
Another day that was good but not great. A day where I found myself distracted by the various little things that are lying out there in the grass to snip at your heels as you run by, to trip you up and slow you down.
In short it was a day when I didn't get as much done as I had hoped. At the same time I had some good interactions with new clients that will at least help me keep moving forward. Some days it seems that this is the most you can expect, even when you are hopefully playing toward the top of your game.
As Sam Eliot says in The Big Lebowski, "Sometimes you eat the bar, sometimes the bar eats you."
Today I got away with a small nip.
In short it was a day when I didn't get as much done as I had hoped. At the same time I had some good interactions with new clients that will at least help me keep moving forward. Some days it seems that this is the most you can expect, even when you are hopefully playing toward the top of your game.
As Sam Eliot says in The Big Lebowski, "Sometimes you eat the bar, sometimes the bar eats you."
Today I got away with a small nip.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Day 17 - Slooowwwwwwly I turn... Step by step...
You have to be of "a certain age" to remember the Three Stooges routine I reference in the title.
What brings it to mind this afternoon has nothing to do with The Three Stooges, but with the process of the day.
The week has been a good one so far. I've pulled together a schedule and started on several new goals that were in the list two weeks ago but which I didn't begin to address until yesterday. At the same time, there are other parts of the plan that seem to slip through my grasp.
In particular is a plan that I have labored over for nearly three years; an attempt to turn Wednesday into what it was for the Mouseketeers... Anything Can Happen Day! For me, it's intended to take this afternoon smack in the middle of the week and give me a chance to do research, explore new ideas, go to a museum, or the library... ANYTHING that can push me over the hump of hump day and into the rest of the week, supercharged with ideas and ready to complete important tasks.
What it's turned into (almost every week for the last three years) is a day of pick me ups and catch ups; a day when the things that got lost in the first part of the week get tied up (or at least wrapped in a bow). Frankly, this isn't a bad thing per se, but it isn't what I've been trying to make happen.
What it is, is another part of the process... Each element, each task, needs practice and grace. Each step is only partial. It's a marathon not a long jump.
Slooowwwwwwly I turn... just don't mention Niagra Falls.
What brings it to mind this afternoon has nothing to do with The Three Stooges, but with the process of the day.
The week has been a good one so far. I've pulled together a schedule and started on several new goals that were in the list two weeks ago but which I didn't begin to address until yesterday. At the same time, there are other parts of the plan that seem to slip through my grasp.
In particular is a plan that I have labored over for nearly three years; an attempt to turn Wednesday into what it was for the Mouseketeers... Anything Can Happen Day! For me, it's intended to take this afternoon smack in the middle of the week and give me a chance to do research, explore new ideas, go to a museum, or the library... ANYTHING that can push me over the hump of hump day and into the rest of the week, supercharged with ideas and ready to complete important tasks.
What it's turned into (almost every week for the last three years) is a day of pick me ups and catch ups; a day when the things that got lost in the first part of the week get tied up (or at least wrapped in a bow). Frankly, this isn't a bad thing per se, but it isn't what I've been trying to make happen.
What it is, is another part of the process... Each element, each task, needs practice and grace. Each step is only partial. It's a marathon not a long jump.
Slooowwwwwwly I turn... just don't mention Niagra Falls.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Day 16 - The Yin and Yang of The Here and Now
My reading list at the moment (now that I just finished a biography of Babe Ruth that I've been reading along the arc of baseball season) is an interesting yin yang (what others might perhaps choose to call schizophrenic) of Thomas Merton and Hunter Thompson ("Fear and Loathing on the Campaign Trail")... my musical choices tend to flip between Springsteen and Bernstein (with a little Cockburn thrown in for good measure)... and my physical activities struggle with each other across the divide between running and sitting.This is me two weeks in with 24 Days left "...to Life." It's not terribly different from the delicate balance between success and failure, life and death, asceticism and debauchery, or abundance and insolvency that I have struck through most of my life. This time though, I am noticing that the intentionality of examination, and the accompanying attempt to lay it all out in public does put a razor edge to the whole thing. It pushes me up on days when I might be more likely to go under and it forces me forward when I would rather sit on the barstool and have another beer (not that that doesn't still happen on occasion, just to be clear).
I possess a definite bi-polar streak. I believe it to be medically related to my epilepsy, and it tends to be mostly manageable, though I'm really not sure whether the dilantin I take for the epilepsy affects it or not.
The balance tends to be tenuous nonetheless. What works for me though is focus... CONSTANT focus. If I let my guard down I can lose my balance in seconds. What I was working on, so hard and so enthusiastically, only moments before can be lost, forgotten, as if it never existed. The focus keeps me awake... and alive.
Sitting... centeredness... reflection. These things keep me steady.
At the same time, if I become too settled, if I sit on the cushion for too long, or move too slowly (for whatever reason) through the day, a deadening lethargy comes on; my consciousness feels like it's shrouded; my senses go numb. Needless to say, this doesn't work for me either.
Action is necessary. While I am very fond of the meditative suggestion, "Don't just do something, sit there," sooner or later, either to stem off entropy, or obtain sustenance for the body, one must indeed move. At that point a decision is called for, and a direction required. I like the movement. I hunger for action.
When I sit, I feel the glow... When I run, I feel the fire.
What works... is the dance. Balanced between light and dark, action and non-action, running and waiting I seem to be finding my life.
---
There are presently five ravens gathered outside my front door (I am NOT kidding!).
Monday, September 22, 2008
Day 15 - Four weeks to go...
This day feels like the moment of truth. This week feels like the real time for challenge.
For my "Monday morning meeting" with myself today, I went back through the goals I set two weeks ago (Goals I really do plan on posting here sometime soon) and considered what I've accomplished, what I have at least made headway on, and what i haven't even started.
I came to the conclusion, that actually, I'm doing a pretty good job.
But this week, it's time to turn up the heat. I feel like the two weeks previous have been a sort of "shake down cruise." I've been rooting around in the dirt of my psyche trying to get a better handle on what I feel like matters and how to make it come to life in the real world.
Today I start up on all the things I have successfully put off. I'm definitely a bit tired, but I'm also ready for more.
Now is when I get to see if all these grandiose plans and dreams have any legs of their own.
For my "Monday morning meeting" with myself today, I went back through the goals I set two weeks ago (Goals I really do plan on posting here sometime soon) and considered what I've accomplished, what I have at least made headway on, and what i haven't even started.
I came to the conclusion, that actually, I'm doing a pretty good job.
But this week, it's time to turn up the heat. I feel like the two weeks previous have been a sort of "shake down cruise." I've been rooting around in the dirt of my psyche trying to get a better handle on what I feel like matters and how to make it come to life in the real world.
Today I start up on all the things I have successfully put off. I'm definitely a bit tired, but I'm also ready for more.
Now is when I get to see if all these grandiose plans and dreams have any legs of their own.
Days 13 and 14
Saturday and Sunday this week were once again a set of sort of catch up days.
It was both frustrating and engaging on Saturday to have a wonderful event to go to at the vineyards of Roshambo winery up in Dry creek, and event that my daughter and her hubby were planning to attend as well, but to feel like I had to much toehr work to catch up on, too many irons in the fire, to take the day for "the fun of it."
Instead, I stayed home, got some of the online work I needed to accomplish finished and then got involved in a bunch of the typical kinds of things (house cleaning, shopping, washing the clothes) that always interfere with life sooner or later.
It was however a good day for learning the very thing I wrote about two days before. Despite the fact that I had an invitation to an exceptionally fun event that I really wanted to attend, I have to say that I was indeed happy to stay at home, to work, and to get things done.
Sunday went the way I keep trying to make it go... No work, no computer (well, almost no computer) and a lot of rest, thought, spirit and relationship.
Watched the last game at Yankee Stadium and cried.
It was a good good day.
It was both frustrating and engaging on Saturday to have a wonderful event to go to at the vineyards of Roshambo winery up in Dry creek, and event that my daughter and her hubby were planning to attend as well, but to feel like I had to much toehr work to catch up on, too many irons in the fire, to take the day for "the fun of it."
Instead, I stayed home, got some of the online work I needed to accomplish finished and then got involved in a bunch of the typical kinds of things (house cleaning, shopping, washing the clothes) that always interfere with life sooner or later.
It was however a good day for learning the very thing I wrote about two days before. Despite the fact that I had an invitation to an exceptionally fun event that I really wanted to attend, I have to say that I was indeed happy to stay at home, to work, and to get things done.
Sunday went the way I keep trying to make it go... No work, no computer (well, almost no computer) and a lot of rest, thought, spirit and relationship.
Watched the last game at Yankee Stadium and cried.
It was a good good day.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Day 12 - Just Do It
It's an old, and by now rather tired, ad campaign, but when it was created it was brilliant. Nike's Just Do It slogan cut to the chase and ran right by all the excuses. The idea remains brilliant still.
So much of what I do... is hesitant, second-guessed, over the shoulder tenuousness that it is frankly amazing that I get anything done at all.
This morning I found a piece of paper that I gave as a Christmas present last December. It was the listing of a series of games at Yankee stadium and it was my plan to go to one or more of those games. The trip never happened, the games went on without us and here I sit this morning looking at the paper and wondering how I let that moment slip through my hands.
But that's really not hard to figure out. The moment slipped through my hands because I simply did not fully believe in what I promised to do. This lack of faith led to a lack of vision, a lack of preparation, and ultimately a lack of accomplishment.
The moment passed and the opportunity for something magical was missed.
This is what I see in what I do today.
There is nothing on my list of goals for the remaining 28 days of this program that can be accomplished... not a single thing... without my complete faith in its possibility and my complete commitment to the goal. You don't make it through the crux of a climb when you're looking back at the ground.
Or as Frank says... "Don't dream it... be it."
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Follow Your Bliss
I went out for my walk at lunch (it was actually supposed to be a run, but, well... you know) and as I was tripping lightly down the road, I began contemplating all the things I had put down in the previous post.
What came to my mind was the reminder of Bill Moyers and Joseph Campbell discussing purpose and how to find your true calling.
"Follow Your Bliss." (You can find it about 35 minutes in on the video above).
This has never meant what so many people have taken it to mean... namely, some sort of sophisticated attempt at "Do Whatcha Wanna!." It is instead a challenge to look at what you love; seek out what truly moves you, follow the tastes and the tantalizations that your psyche has thrown out at you for your entire life.
What is your soul calling you to?
What captured my imagination as I was walking along was the intermittent joy, the tiny giggle, and the outright joyous laughter that can come upon me at any given time when I am "in the zone."
And so I had this thought... What if I were to only do what truly made me happy?
I know that at first blush this sounds like the most selfish, self-involved proposal that anyone could suggest. But what if it's not that?
What filled my mind, in considering all the things I wrote about in the previous post, was a very simple question.
What if you only did what makes you happy?
Now there are two ways to look at this:
1) What you are doing is genuinely exactly what you want to do right now and it is at the center of what you love (your bliss)... No brainer... It makes you happy. Do it.
2) I really do not like this, it's not something I want to do and it definitely does not make me happy.
If the answer to the specific question/activity is #2 then things get interesting.
1) You can give it up.. simply choose not to do it. The consequences of this behavior could range from doing something else, taking an afternoon off, to quitting (or being fired from) your job (or divorced from your family).
2) You can delegate and send the task to someone else. You may worry about how THAT person feels about it, but it may be (I'm not fully committed to this answer, but it's interesting) that it then becomes their question to ask.
3) You can CHOOSE to find joy in the task because the task is necessary for the goal of achieving something that DOES make you happy (more money, a better relationship, a healthy child, a better world).
4) You can turn it into something that makes you happy because happy is better than angry and there's no other way out.
What I want to propose, as irresponsible as it may be, is that if, for whatever reason, we find a way to make everything we do a joy... a CHOICE for joy... it will transform all we do and it will transform each of our lives and the world as we know it.
So I've decided to add this to the remaining month of my six week program.
If I can't find joy in a task, by one way or another, then I am not going to do it.
What might happen then?
It's entirely possible that this is utter bullshit and the end result of such thinking is a complete meltdown of life as we know it.
I don't know... but right now, it's 5 o'clock somew... actually, it's 5 o'clock right here.
What came to my mind was the reminder of Bill Moyers and Joseph Campbell discussing purpose and how to find your true calling.
"Follow Your Bliss." (You can find it about 35 minutes in on the video above).
This has never meant what so many people have taken it to mean... namely, some sort of sophisticated attempt at "Do Whatcha Wanna!." It is instead a challenge to look at what you love; seek out what truly moves you, follow the tastes and the tantalizations that your psyche has thrown out at you for your entire life.
What is your soul calling you to?
What captured my imagination as I was walking along was the intermittent joy, the tiny giggle, and the outright joyous laughter that can come upon me at any given time when I am "in the zone."
And so I had this thought... What if I were to only do what truly made me happy?
I know that at first blush this sounds like the most selfish, self-involved proposal that anyone could suggest. But what if it's not that?
What filled my mind, in considering all the things I wrote about in the previous post, was a very simple question.
What if you only did what makes you happy?
Now there are two ways to look at this:
1) What you are doing is genuinely exactly what you want to do right now and it is at the center of what you love (your bliss)... No brainer... It makes you happy. Do it.
2) I really do not like this, it's not something I want to do and it definitely does not make me happy.
If the answer to the specific question/activity is #2 then things get interesting.
1) You can give it up.. simply choose not to do it. The consequences of this behavior could range from doing something else, taking an afternoon off, to quitting (or being fired from) your job (or divorced from your family).
2) You can delegate and send the task to someone else. You may worry about how THAT person feels about it, but it may be (I'm not fully committed to this answer, but it's interesting) that it then becomes their question to ask.
3) You can CHOOSE to find joy in the task because the task is necessary for the goal of achieving something that DOES make you happy (more money, a better relationship, a healthy child, a better world).
4) You can turn it into something that makes you happy because happy is better than angry and there's no other way out.
What I want to propose, as irresponsible as it may be, is that if, for whatever reason, we find a way to make everything we do a joy... a CHOICE for joy... it will transform all we do and it will transform each of our lives and the world as we know it.
So I've decided to add this to the remaining month of my six week program.
If I can't find joy in a task, by one way or another, then I am not going to do it.
What might happen then?
It's entirely possible that this is utter bullshit and the end result of such thinking is a complete meltdown of life as we know it.
I don't know... but right now, it's 5 o'clock somew... actually, it's 5 o'clock right here.
Day 11 - What Really Matters?
One of the primary failures (perhaps THE primary failure) of my attempt at these programs has been the fact that I spend incredible amounts of time on things that have little or no relation to what I want my life to be like or about.
This has been the case for most of my adult life.
When my daughter was little, I made the distinct choice to figure out a way to work from home and to spend as much time as possible with her. I volunteered at school, went on field trips, hung out at home when she had friends over, shopped for dinner, cooked dinner, drove around for important events... and pretty much messed up completely by having too few resources to do some of the "special" things, or having something that distracted me from the moment, or somehow simply missing out on a whole lot of the very opportunities I had wanted to increase by making the choices I made.
Why did it happen that way? Misplaced priorities and a lack of attention to detail.
Throughout several business ventures, while being engaged in things that I like, I have rarely taken the time (work time, leisure time, friend time) to really do the things I love.
Why did it happen that way? Misplaced priorities and a lack of attention to detail.
I could go on and on in a self-indulgent diatribe on the way I have shuffled my way through much of my existence, but if you know me you already have most of the details; if you don't know me you probably don't want to hear about it anyway.
To use one very simple and clear illustration (and make Hoz happy in the process)... One word... Surfing.
So... what does that have to do with me today on the eleventh day of this forty day excursion?
Choice... Timing... Focus.
What matters most?
For some reason it's very easy for me to spend time working on projects that don't pay anything, or don't pay enough, out of some sort of charitable inclination (or at least that's what I tell myself), but the truth is that something else is going on. These thigs that consume my time in this way are not "charitable" causes, they are rarely the most important things on the agenda, and they are often well down that list. Somewhere I am getting distracted from the real goal. Somehow I'm not asking the right questions.
I have a lot of things I want to accomplish in this 40 days, among them a number of business things that hang around my neck like a half dozen Albatross, tasks I just can't seem to complete, and plans and structures for new activities that I just don't get around to putting in place.
It's time to focus on the central questions. Out of this whole list of things (and the things that aren't on the list but nevertheless impose themselves on my psyche) what is truly facilitative? What brings satisfaction? What provides what I need?
What... is... IMPORTANT?
What do I really want?
This has been the case for most of my adult life.
When my daughter was little, I made the distinct choice to figure out a way to work from home and to spend as much time as possible with her. I volunteered at school, went on field trips, hung out at home when she had friends over, shopped for dinner, cooked dinner, drove around for important events... and pretty much messed up completely by having too few resources to do some of the "special" things, or having something that distracted me from the moment, or somehow simply missing out on a whole lot of the very opportunities I had wanted to increase by making the choices I made.
Why did it happen that way? Misplaced priorities and a lack of attention to detail.
Throughout several business ventures, while being engaged in things that I like, I have rarely taken the time (work time, leisure time, friend time) to really do the things I love.
Why did it happen that way? Misplaced priorities and a lack of attention to detail.
I could go on and on in a self-indulgent diatribe on the way I have shuffled my way through much of my existence, but if you know me you already have most of the details; if you don't know me you probably don't want to hear about it anyway.
To use one very simple and clear illustration (and make Hoz happy in the process)... One word... Surfing.
So... what does that have to do with me today on the eleventh day of this forty day excursion?
Choice... Timing... Focus.
What matters most?
For some reason it's very easy for me to spend time working on projects that don't pay anything, or don't pay enough, out of some sort of charitable inclination (or at least that's what I tell myself), but the truth is that something else is going on. These thigs that consume my time in this way are not "charitable" causes, they are rarely the most important things on the agenda, and they are often well down that list. Somewhere I am getting distracted from the real goal. Somehow I'm not asking the right questions.
I have a lot of things I want to accomplish in this 40 days, among them a number of business things that hang around my neck like a half dozen Albatross, tasks I just can't seem to complete, and plans and structures for new activities that I just don't get around to putting in place.
It's time to focus on the central questions. Out of this whole list of things (and the things that aren't on the list but nevertheless impose themselves on my psyche) what is truly facilitative? What brings satisfaction? What provides what I need?
What... is... IMPORTANT?
What do I really want?
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Day 10 - Dr. Pepper Time
The biggest time suck in my (and very possibly your) life is the frigging emails I get on a minute by minute basis.
My junk box intake is over 1,000 emails a day (often twice that) and that doesn't even count the several hundred more that sneak through the filter. On top of that is time I spend having to go back through that "time-saving" junk filter to find the occasional piece of email that I need and that got shunted tot he wrong place.
Tim Ferris makes the case for checking email no more than twice a day: once around noon and once at the end of the day. This of course doesn't address the fact that each time I go into email I can spend an hour dealing with the various issues, but I have tried the plan a few times and it does in fact help.
One problem with the model for me however is that if I wait until noon to make my first email check in the day I can miss certain things that I need to deal with, or people I need to hear from. I'm probably overvaluing this need, since on the days when I have waited, the world has not ended, but this fear remains in my mind nonetheless.
However... I do know one thing very clearly. Email is wasting my life.
On days when I don't force myself into a rigid regulation of the time I spend on email I lose literally hours of time in the black hole of this silently overbearing fascist technology.
So... I'm starting a new plan that I'm calling Dr. Pepper Time.
10 - 2 - 4 may not mean a lot to you unless your a Dr. Pepper fanatic and/or at least 50 years old. For me it stands out in my mind because I am both.
So it's easy to remember (hell, I might even start drinking DP again, though I think I'll have to buy a case of the REAL thing (and I ain't talkin' Coke) first.
10 gives me the opportunity to get some things done in the morning before I risk becoming irretrievably distracted by email. At the same time it gives me a chance to check on people on the US East Coast (or even across the pond) before the day has completely gone away.
2 lets me get through other stuff in the middle of the day, grab a bite, run or workout, yet at the same time it gives me a chance to catch people on the east coast at the end of the day or people on the west coast while there's still time to make things happen.
4 means I get responses from the other interactions of the day, still have time to respond, yet also leaves me with time before the end of the day to make plans, look to the next day, get out last minute material.
All of this serves a singular purpose... improving efficiency while reducing the unbelievable amount of wasted time and energy I've watched email steal over the last ten years of my life.
So... if you send me email and you're wondering why you're not getting instant answers like you used to... just have a Dr. Pepper and give it some time.
My junk box intake is over 1,000 emails a day (often twice that) and that doesn't even count the several hundred more that sneak through the filter. On top of that is time I spend having to go back through that "time-saving" junk filter to find the occasional piece of email that I need and that got shunted tot he wrong place.
Tim Ferris makes the case for checking email no more than twice a day: once around noon and once at the end of the day. This of course doesn't address the fact that each time I go into email I can spend an hour dealing with the various issues, but I have tried the plan a few times and it does in fact help.
One problem with the model for me however is that if I wait until noon to make my first email check in the day I can miss certain things that I need to deal with, or people I need to hear from. I'm probably overvaluing this need, since on the days when I have waited, the world has not ended, but this fear remains in my mind nonetheless.
However... I do know one thing very clearly. Email is wasting my life.
On days when I don't force myself into a rigid regulation of the time I spend on email I lose literally hours of time in the black hole of this silently overbearing fascist technology.
So... I'm starting a new plan that I'm calling Dr. Pepper Time.
10 - 2 - 4 may not mean a lot to you unless your a Dr. Pepper fanatic and/or at least 50 years old. For me it stands out in my mind because I am both.
So it's easy to remember (hell, I might even start drinking DP again, though I think I'll have to buy a case of the REAL thing (and I ain't talkin' Coke) first.
10 gives me the opportunity to get some things done in the morning before I risk becoming irretrievably distracted by email. At the same time it gives me a chance to check on people on the US East Coast (or even across the pond) before the day has completely gone away.
2 lets me get through other stuff in the middle of the day, grab a bite, run or workout, yet at the same time it gives me a chance to catch people on the east coast at the end of the day or people on the west coast while there's still time to make things happen.
4 means I get responses from the other interactions of the day, still have time to respond, yet also leaves me with time before the end of the day to make plans, look to the next day, get out last minute material.
All of this serves a singular purpose... improving efficiency while reducing the unbelievable amount of wasted time and energy I've watched email steal over the last ten years of my life.
So... if you send me email and you're wondering why you're not getting instant answers like you used to... just have a Dr. Pepper and give it some time.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Day 9 - Struggling with Chaos
Like I said, the second week always tends to be the point when things are most difficult. Typically, the newness and excitement of the first week have passed and the drive, gathering, and settling have not fully begun. Plans are in place but the structures have not really been formed.
That's what today was like.
Many of the disciplines I need to make any of this ultimately work are just not formed. I meant to run today, I didn't. I meant to move to checking email twice a day... instead I spent the afternoon checking rechecking and checking again ( a TREMENDOUS waste of time, energy, focus, and productivity). I meant to eat and drink more nourishingly... I ALMOST pulled that off, but not quite.
In general, the day was a bit of a cluster....
What I know - not only from past attempts at this process, but also from life in general - is that it is imperative not to let this trip turn into a major fall. Despite the fact that I didn't make everything work the way I wanted it to, I did accomplish some significant things. Despite the fact that I did not follow my plan in any way, doesn't mean that I can't do it tomorrow.
There's more to this journey than one day.
That's what today was like.
Many of the disciplines I need to make any of this ultimately work are just not formed. I meant to run today, I didn't. I meant to move to checking email twice a day... instead I spent the afternoon checking rechecking and checking again ( a TREMENDOUS waste of time, energy, focus, and productivity). I meant to eat and drink more nourishingly... I ALMOST pulled that off, but not quite.
In general, the day was a bit of a cluster....
What I know - not only from past attempts at this process, but also from life in general - is that it is imperative not to let this trip turn into a major fall. Despite the fact that I didn't make everything work the way I wanted it to, I did accomplish some significant things. Despite the fact that I did not follow my plan in any way, doesn't mean that I can't do it tomorrow.
There's more to this journey than one day.
Monday, September 15, 2008
A Tombstone Hand and a Graveyard Mind...
After my evening meditation, I read a piece from Merton's journals. The date of the piece was September 7, 1958, a time when he was not so rigid and tenuous as he seems to have been when he first arrived at the monastery 17 years earlier. At the same time he is clearly not as open and free as he would become before his death ten years later.
The piece also comes a day after he spent time with old friends, being a little bold, adventuring out from the monastery and clearly feeling a sense of some of what he missed from his old life.
"I fear to be content with what I have - I fear it is inglorious. In the last few days I have seen what matters is to be humble enough to admit that I am content with just this..."
It strikes me this evening like the whack of a shovel across the top of my head (an experience I am familiar with), commanding me to look straight into the darkness between Merton's "contentment" (or attempt at it) and my own contentment played out against my deep desire to be more, do more, have more, live more.
I tilt back and forth on the fulcrum I have set for myself, yearning for new growth and new ways of being, but also afraid, as Merton, to be either content, and/or not content, with what I have. Afraid of the stretch to something new... Terrified of remaining in one place.
My mind, and my spirit, ask a question about intention and the road ahead... "What is it that you're looking for? Why do you want it?"
Or as the old song goes... "Who Do You Love?"
Or as the old song goes... "Who Do You Love?"
Day 8 - Moving On
"Look at what you've done
Then at what you want
Not at where you are...
Where you'll be"
"Move On" from "Sunday in the Park with George"
by Stephen Sondheim
In the past, every time I have attempted one of these 6 week plans, I have run into snags somewhere about now.
Despite my attempts to make it play out otherwise, week 1 has always been a little like the first week of the Tour de France, or the first lap of the Indy 500. It's a shakedown... a jostling for position. The week is largely made up of adjusting priorities, changing the projected schedules, dropping some goals and picking up others. And that is exactly how things played out last week, but this time with a difference. From the very beginning of the week I had a sense that this is the way things would go and while I had a pretty clear sense of direction, and a solid list of goals, I was more aware than in previous attempts that achieving my goals was going to require an openness and a flexibility.
An example:
I always lay out a very rigid schedule with solid blocks of time for writing, and other blocks of time for business. In addition, I always lay out time for the "support disciplines," things like meditation, running, reading and journaling. By the time I get to the end of the first week I am already running about 36 hours behind my intended schedule. There's just too much to fit in. I get frustrated, disappointed in myself, and the stage begins to be se for failure and discouragement.
Last week, I began with the same kind of goals and the same kind of scheduling, but with the sense that the plans required flexibility if they were going to find their own place and their own rhythm. So... instead of running four days a week last week (something that was a bit insane considering the fact that it's basically been two years since I last ran with any serious intent), I ran once, walked my full intended course another day and laid off the other two days. My plan now is to expand that practice each week until, by week 4, I am running four days a week and I can begin to expand the mileage in a way that I can continue to maintain it when I finish my 40 days (Big Sur Marathon here I come... again!).
The same went for my writing discipline. Instead of rigidly locking into my intended 20 hours/week right from the start, I gave myself some room to adjust. I continue to hold the ultimate goal as the place I want to be before the end of the program, but easing into it seems to be working more effectively.
So that's where I am beginning this second week. I have now laid a pretty solid foundation. I have laid out my goals, evaluated them, adjusted them and started working on every one (well every one except learning French, but that will start this week).
Unlike second weeks in the past, I start this second without fretting over what I didn't accomplish, but instead looking toward the expansion of last week's goals into the bigger space of this week on the way to the weeks following (not looking at where I am, but where I'll be).
What I am discovering right off the bat is that I already feel stronger, better, and more prepared to take on the next step.
Then at what you want
Not at where you are...
Where you'll be"
"Move On" from "Sunday in the Park with George"
by Stephen Sondheim
In the past, every time I have attempted one of these 6 week plans, I have run into snags somewhere about now.
Despite my attempts to make it play out otherwise, week 1 has always been a little like the first week of the Tour de France, or the first lap of the Indy 500. It's a shakedown... a jostling for position. The week is largely made up of adjusting priorities, changing the projected schedules, dropping some goals and picking up others. And that is exactly how things played out last week, but this time with a difference. From the very beginning of the week I had a sense that this is the way things would go and while I had a pretty clear sense of direction, and a solid list of goals, I was more aware than in previous attempts that achieving my goals was going to require an openness and a flexibility.
An example:
I always lay out a very rigid schedule with solid blocks of time for writing, and other blocks of time for business. In addition, I always lay out time for the "support disciplines," things like meditation, running, reading and journaling. By the time I get to the end of the first week I am already running about 36 hours behind my intended schedule. There's just too much to fit in. I get frustrated, disappointed in myself, and the stage begins to be se for failure and discouragement.
Last week, I began with the same kind of goals and the same kind of scheduling, but with the sense that the plans required flexibility if they were going to find their own place and their own rhythm. So... instead of running four days a week last week (something that was a bit insane considering the fact that it's basically been two years since I last ran with any serious intent), I ran once, walked my full intended course another day and laid off the other two days. My plan now is to expand that practice each week until, by week 4, I am running four days a week and I can begin to expand the mileage in a way that I can continue to maintain it when I finish my 40 days (Big Sur Marathon here I come... again!).
The same went for my writing discipline. Instead of rigidly locking into my intended 20 hours/week right from the start, I gave myself some room to adjust. I continue to hold the ultimate goal as the place I want to be before the end of the program, but easing into it seems to be working more effectively.
So that's where I am beginning this second week. I have now laid a pretty solid foundation. I have laid out my goals, evaluated them, adjusted them and started working on every one (well every one except learning French, but that will start this week).
Unlike second weeks in the past, I start this second without fretting over what I didn't accomplish, but instead looking toward the expansion of last week's goals into the bigger space of this week on the way to the weeks following (not looking at where I am, but where I'll be).
What I am discovering right off the bat is that I already feel stronger, better, and more prepared to take on the next step.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Sunday... The Day Off
One of the most important features in my whole plan is the discipline of Sabbath. For me, I choose to take this Sabbath day on Sunday, but whether you take in on Sunday, Saturday, or some other day during the week, the important thing is to take it.
All discipline, whether mental, physical, spiritual, or practical, requires the juxtaposition of work vs. relaxation in order to have its greatest effectiveness. Intense weight training is based on the concept that you stress the muscles and then give them time to rebuild. Other forms of physical training (like running or swimming) require the same kind of stress vs. rest discipline. Even dieting experts suggest that regardless of how carefully you regulate your calories, your mental connection to the process requires that you give yourself some time off from the routine.
For me... that's Sunday, and Sunday is made up of resting, reading, playing, loafing, laughing, light running (maybe), some sort of spiritual discipline (meditation, prayer, church, or a walk in the woods).
The other thing I do with Sunday, at least as often as I can possibly get away with it (which is increasingly most of the time) is make it a day of Digital Fasting. I try to stay completely away from computers, text messaging, and any other forms of high-tech time wasting/spirit sucking as its possible to be. Occasionally, for one no good reason or another, I get dragged back in to the didigtal realm on my Sabbath, but the more I seek to maintain this discipline, the more easy I find it to be. And not only does this discipline give me a much needed respite from staring at my monitor and exacerbating my carpal tunnel syndrome, it also frees my mind and prepares me for the rest of the week.
Today, I succeeded at all of it. Basically, I was a slug.
But a happy slug... and now I'm ready for next week.
All discipline, whether mental, physical, spiritual, or practical, requires the juxtaposition of work vs. relaxation in order to have its greatest effectiveness. Intense weight training is based on the concept that you stress the muscles and then give them time to rebuild. Other forms of physical training (like running or swimming) require the same kind of stress vs. rest discipline. Even dieting experts suggest that regardless of how carefully you regulate your calories, your mental connection to the process requires that you give yourself some time off from the routine.
For me... that's Sunday, and Sunday is made up of resting, reading, playing, loafing, laughing, light running (maybe), some sort of spiritual discipline (meditation, prayer, church, or a walk in the woods).
The other thing I do with Sunday, at least as often as I can possibly get away with it (which is increasingly most of the time) is make it a day of Digital Fasting. I try to stay completely away from computers, text messaging, and any other forms of high-tech time wasting/spirit sucking as its possible to be. Occasionally, for one no good reason or another, I get dragged back in to the didigtal realm on my Sabbath, but the more I seek to maintain this discipline, the more easy I find it to be. And not only does this discipline give me a much needed respite from staring at my monitor and exacerbating my carpal tunnel syndrome, it also frees my mind and prepares me for the rest of the week.
Today, I succeeded at all of it. Basically, I was a slug.
But a happy slug... and now I'm ready for next week.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Catching Up and Casting Off
This first Saturday of my 40 Days has been about doing everything that I didn't do earlier in the week. Some of that was simply REST, and some of that has been work, the little extras of work that fall through the cracks.
This afternoon I spent a great deal of time digging into my financial hopes, dreams and plans to create a spreadsheet of Income and Expense (something that I have only done once before in my entire life). That done, my next step is to look at those elements of income and expense and lay down the framework for buying into and planning out the way that picture can work.
If, for example, I'm going to sell audio tour ads during October to begin financing a new set of audio tours, I now have to come up with the sales plan and the related materials. If I'm going to develop a separate set of tour materials for sale online I have to develop the business plan and investment strategy to make that work. Anyone who has done this for as long as I have ought to know this instinctually... Me, I've got to create it out of whole cloth each time I start.
But that's what Saturday is about... Taking care of the stuff that got left on the stack the week before, preparing for the week to come, an, in the midst of it all, trying to find tie to have a little fun.
By all accounts... It's been a pretty good day.
This afternoon I spent a great deal of time digging into my financial hopes, dreams and plans to create a spreadsheet of Income and Expense (something that I have only done once before in my entire life). That done, my next step is to look at those elements of income and expense and lay down the framework for buying into and planning out the way that picture can work.
If, for example, I'm going to sell audio tour ads during October to begin financing a new set of audio tours, I now have to come up with the sales plan and the related materials. If I'm going to develop a separate set of tour materials for sale online I have to develop the business plan and investment strategy to make that work. Anyone who has done this for as long as I have ought to know this instinctually... Me, I've got to create it out of whole cloth each time I start.
But that's what Saturday is about... Taking care of the stuff that got left on the stack the week before, preparing for the week to come, an, in the midst of it all, trying to find tie to have a little fun.
By all accounts... It's been a pretty good day.
Friday, September 12, 2008
Day 5 - Sliding Into First
I've come to the end of the first monday - friday of my six week program. In the past, this is the day when things are really difficult. The unnatural discipline of the week and various things that I have not been able to get done, or ways that I have not fully succeeded, begin to grate.
While this week has been more productive and more grounded than previous attempts, I still arrive at Friday a little tired (of course that isn't helped by my staying out late last night) a little frazzled and a little frustrated. I've been more scattered today than the previous four days and several bits of discipline that I put in place in order to function more effectively have sort of fallen by the side of the road. The workload I wanted to complete is not fully done, and the distractions I wanted to avoid have raised there ugly heads more than I would like.
Still... it's Friday afternoon and while I'm feeling tired, I'm also feeling strong.
What did I accomplish so far this week?
• I nailed down my priorities for the period. I reworked them, evaluated them and came up with a set of satisfying (if ambitious) goals which I'll be posting sometime over the weekend.
• I began two separate exercise programs: yoga/calisthenics three days a week and running/walking on four (two of which come up Saturday and Sunday).
• I have paid greater attention to the food I eat and the drink I drink and while the changes I have made are miniscule compared to where I want to be in 35 days, they're still pretty significant for right now.
• I've fulfilled one of my main work goals - that of making at least three new business contacts/week.
• I've begun to put some new, and very necessary, business disciplines in place as a way of beginning to pursue that "inferior function" I was writing about yesterday.
• I've found it possible to operate with a greater calmness, presence, and focus than usual even though I'm still far too scattered to be happy with the way things are.
• I've written (quite a bit actually) every day.
All in all... I'm pretty happy with the progress.
It's Miller Time!
While this week has been more productive and more grounded than previous attempts, I still arrive at Friday a little tired (of course that isn't helped by my staying out late last night) a little frazzled and a little frustrated. I've been more scattered today than the previous four days and several bits of discipline that I put in place in order to function more effectively have sort of fallen by the side of the road. The workload I wanted to complete is not fully done, and the distractions I wanted to avoid have raised there ugly heads more than I would like.
Still... it's Friday afternoon and while I'm feeling tired, I'm also feeling strong.
What did I accomplish so far this week?
• I nailed down my priorities for the period. I reworked them, evaluated them and came up with a set of satisfying (if ambitious) goals which I'll be posting sometime over the weekend.
• I began two separate exercise programs: yoga/calisthenics three days a week and running/walking on four (two of which come up Saturday and Sunday).
• I have paid greater attention to the food I eat and the drink I drink and while the changes I have made are miniscule compared to where I want to be in 35 days, they're still pretty significant for right now.
• I've fulfilled one of my main work goals - that of making at least three new business contacts/week.
• I've begun to put some new, and very necessary, business disciplines in place as a way of beginning to pursue that "inferior function" I was writing about yesterday.
• I've found it possible to operate with a greater calmness, presence, and focus than usual even though I'm still far too scattered to be happy with the way things are.
• I've written (quite a bit actually) every day.
All in all... I'm pretty happy with the progress.
It's Miller Time!
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Day 4 - God Is In The Details
Many years ago a terrific therapist that I worked with in San Francisco gave me a quote from Marie Louise Von Franz that has stuck with me ever since. He said... she said... "It is in your inferior function that you will find your life."
For me, an ENFP person, my thinking and judging functions (those basic realities that get you through the practical matters of life) are very very low. They ARE my "inferior functions" and I have been miserable at making use of them for the first part of my life. There have been a couple of times when I've done well at it, and true to the prediction, they were my most productive and successful moments.
The good news in this is that all the theories about personality function (all derived from and dependent on Carl Jung's theories) suggest that it is in later life that you begin to access and make serious use of those aspects.
Well... at 54 years old, I guess that's where I am.
What this means in the present situation is that the key to this process I have plunged myself into is making use of the detail elements. What I need to do, more than anything else right now, is get the details right.
In re-examining my goals yesterday, I didn't find very much I really wanted to change, or drop. What I did realize is that I need to lay out a course to progress through and that course needs to start with grounding elements like budgets, income-expense tables, and the real details of the basic business elements I want to follow. The things that will provide the foundation for all the rest.
It is THESE elements of the plan that will set the ground for all the rest, and it is these elements that I am the worst at mastering; they are indeed the manifestation of my inferior function.
So... that's where I'm going to start... at ground level, at the base, at the beginning.
For me, an ENFP person, my thinking and judging functions (those basic realities that get you through the practical matters of life) are very very low. They ARE my "inferior functions" and I have been miserable at making use of them for the first part of my life. There have been a couple of times when I've done well at it, and true to the prediction, they were my most productive and successful moments.
The good news in this is that all the theories about personality function (all derived from and dependent on Carl Jung's theories) suggest that it is in later life that you begin to access and make serious use of those aspects.
Well... at 54 years old, I guess that's where I am.
What this means in the present situation is that the key to this process I have plunged myself into is making use of the detail elements. What I need to do, more than anything else right now, is get the details right.
In re-examining my goals yesterday, I didn't find very much I really wanted to change, or drop. What I did realize is that I need to lay out a course to progress through and that course needs to start with grounding elements like budgets, income-expense tables, and the real details of the basic business elements I want to follow. The things that will provide the foundation for all the rest.
It is THESE elements of the plan that will set the ground for all the rest, and it is these elements that I am the worst at mastering; they are indeed the manifestation of my inferior function.
So... that's where I'm going to start... at ground level, at the base, at the beginning.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Day 3 - Dreams vs. Reality
Yesterday I completed a long list of goals in four areas of life which I labeled along the lines of the four elements:
Earth - Groundedness, foundational, health and body issues
Air - Spirit matters
Fire - The energy issues, mostly related to money and work
Water - The surrounding stuff - relationship, connection, and personal expansion
Needless to say, with a breakdown like this, and a mind and personality like mine (I’m a 7 in the Eneagram) the list was pretty damn long. One person I sent it to said that a friend of theirs looked at it and said she thought it looked like five year plan, not a six week plan!
I’m not sure that she’s right… But I’m not sure she’s wrong either.
One of my major struggles (and this was pointed out to me as well) is that I tend to take on a pile of stuff: I work on too many committees, I take on too many projects, I mess with too many emails, I subscribe to too many magazines and I read too many books at one time. If I am on-time for an appointment, I will likely say to myself, “Hey… you’ve got ten minutes, go run this errand on the way!” You know where this is going. I run the errand, get stuck in traffic, and boom, I’m twenty minutes late. One night, twenty-three years ago, when I was working on a recording project with several friends, one of those friends (whose phone calls of late I haven’t had the chance to return by the way…) made the comment, “You have the worst sense of time of anyone I’ve ever met.” This was said on the way across the Oakland Bay Bridge from San Francisco to a recording date in Berkeley and we were half an hour – going on an hour – late. I thought we should be right on time.
This morning I’m going to take another look at that list and consider the possibility that I need to whittle it down. I’m not saying that I’m GOING to whittle it down necessarily, but I’m going to consider it. Perhaps it's better to bite off less and succeed at the program. On the other hand, perhaps the very expansiveness of the goal provides a measure of its own energy.
Once I’ve decided, I’ll post both lists so you can decide for yourself whether or not I made the right decision.
Obviously, the ultimate confirmation (or lack thereof) won't be seen for another thirty-seven days.
Earth - Groundedness, foundational, health and body issues
Air - Spirit matters
Fire - The energy issues, mostly related to money and work
Water - The surrounding stuff - relationship, connection, and personal expansion
Needless to say, with a breakdown like this, and a mind and personality like mine (I’m a 7 in the Eneagram) the list was pretty damn long. One person I sent it to said that a friend of theirs looked at it and said she thought it looked like five year plan, not a six week plan!
I’m not sure that she’s right… But I’m not sure she’s wrong either.
One of my major struggles (and this was pointed out to me as well) is that I tend to take on a pile of stuff: I work on too many committees, I take on too many projects, I mess with too many emails, I subscribe to too many magazines and I read too many books at one time. If I am on-time for an appointment, I will likely say to myself, “Hey… you’ve got ten minutes, go run this errand on the way!” You know where this is going. I run the errand, get stuck in traffic, and boom, I’m twenty minutes late. One night, twenty-three years ago, when I was working on a recording project with several friends, one of those friends (whose phone calls of late I haven’t had the chance to return by the way…) made the comment, “You have the worst sense of time of anyone I’ve ever met.” This was said on the way across the Oakland Bay Bridge from San Francisco to a recording date in Berkeley and we were half an hour – going on an hour – late. I thought we should be right on time.
This morning I’m going to take another look at that list and consider the possibility that I need to whittle it down. I’m not saying that I’m GOING to whittle it down necessarily, but I’m going to consider it. Perhaps it's better to bite off less and succeed at the program. On the other hand, perhaps the very expansiveness of the goal provides a measure of its own energy.
Once I’ve decided, I’ll post both lists so you can decide for yourself whether or not I made the right decision.
Obviously, the ultimate confirmation (or lack thereof) won't be seen for another thirty-seven days.
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Words for the Journey
Tim Ferris' book "Four Hour Work Week" has been a great help and inspiration to me over the past several months, not because of the obvious draw that the title offers (I'm still looking for that, but it's not the real message). Tim's got a truly excellent blog that provides insights into an incredibly varied collection of information and helpful suggestions. In addition, the occasional reports on his travels and explorations leave are pretty motivating all on their own.
Despite my great enthusiasm for Ferris, I was still quite surprised to find this post when I went to the site yesterday. It's yet another synchronistic pattern (the kind of thing that tends to happen more and more as you prime your mind and spirit for growth) thrusting itself into my personal time-space continuum. These words from Dr, King, spoken from his Atlanta pulpit only 5 months before he was assassinated in Memphis, are awe inspiring and motivating.
They make a clear and strong statement about what life is about and what is worth living - and dying - for.
Despite my great enthusiasm for Ferris, I was still quite surprised to find this post when I went to the site yesterday. It's yet another synchronistic pattern (the kind of thing that tends to happen more and more as you prime your mind and spirit for growth) thrusting itself into my personal time-space continuum. These words from Dr, King, spoken from his Atlanta pulpit only 5 months before he was assassinated in Memphis, are awe inspiring and motivating.
They make a clear and strong statement about what life is about and what is worth living - and dying - for.
Day 2
Yesterday was a good day.
In previous attempts at this "program" I usually screw things up somewhere on the very first day. That's not necessarily a terrible and unrecoverable thing, but it is a little like trying to run a race after you've slipped on the way out of the blocks.
And speaking of running a race (a bit of a mutton fisted segue, I must admit), I'm off to my first "run" of the program. The intention is to run Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays and Sundays, with the Sunday being a long (or at least longer) slow (though NONE of them are going to be fast) run.
A journey of a thousand miles...
In previous attempts at this "program" I usually screw things up somewhere on the very first day. That's not necessarily a terrible and unrecoverable thing, but it is a little like trying to run a race after you've slipped on the way out of the blocks.
And speaking of running a race (a bit of a mutton fisted segue, I must admit), I'm off to my first "run" of the program. The intention is to run Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays and Sundays, with the Sunday being a long (or at least longer) slow (though NONE of them are going to be fast) run.
A journey of a thousand miles...
Monday, September 8, 2008
I'll sleep when I'm dead
My greatest block to operating with efficiency throughout the day is a huge mid-afternoon slump that I undergo sometime between 2 and 4 pm. Occasionally I succumb to the force completely and lie down for a nap that may last anywhere from ten minutes to an hour, most of the time I just fade to very low energy and keep trying to pound through the work and the day. On occasion, I just give up and go for a beer. This effect is exacerbated by the dilantin that I take for epilepsy, but that's not the whole story either.
Emotionally, this general lethargy tends to be accompanied by some fairly extreme depression, frustration, or anger. Needless to say, it's not a good time for coordinating meetings with clients, or even conversations with friends. It's definitely not a time to talk politics.
No matter what I do, this feeling almost always evaporates and the mood lightens somewhere around 4 and I perk back up, scrambling toward the end of the day, desperately trying to find a way to dig back in and make up for the wasted time and lost productivity.
If I could solve this one problem over the next 6 weeks, my life would be improved significantly.
For now... I'm gonna take a nap.
Emotionally, this general lethargy tends to be accompanied by some fairly extreme depression, frustration, or anger. Needless to say, it's not a good time for coordinating meetings with clients, or even conversations with friends. It's definitely not a time to talk politics.
No matter what I do, this feeling almost always evaporates and the mood lightens somewhere around 4 and I perk back up, scrambling toward the end of the day, desperately trying to find a way to dig back in and make up for the wasted time and lost productivity.
If I could solve this one problem over the next 6 weeks, my life would be improved significantly.
For now... I'm gonna take a nap.
Book Shelf
There are several books that I have read and worked with over and over in this process of coming to terms with my life. Moving into these next six weeks I go back to my bookshelf for both practical advice and spiritual sustenance.
At the moment (and this will definitely expand over the coming weeks) those books are:
Echoing Silence - Tomas Merton on the Vocation of Writing
A Year with Thomas Merton - Daily Meditations from his journals
Four Hour Work Week - Timothy Ferris
Beyond the Summit - Todd Skinner
Ultra-Marathon Man - Dean Karanazes
The Creative Habit - Twyla Tharp (this last being a book I gave to my daughter several years ago and then stole back from her sometime about two years ago. I keep meaning to return it, but then I start reading it again).
At the moment (and this will definitely expand over the coming weeks) those books are:
Echoing Silence - Tomas Merton on the Vocation of Writing
A Year with Thomas Merton - Daily Meditations from his journals
Four Hour Work Week - Timothy Ferris
Beyond the Summit - Todd Skinner
Ultra-Marathon Man - Dean Karanazes
The Creative Habit - Twyla Tharp (this last being a book I gave to my daughter several years ago and then stole back from her sometime about two years ago. I keep meaning to return it, but then I start reading it again).
Go!
I got up this morning, did my first yoga in quite some time (didn't do a lot, because I'm pretty damn stiff), made some coffee, and sat down in front of the iTunes to create a soundtrack (or at least the beginnings of one) for the coming 6 weeks.
I am a very sound oriented person, and I always have been. When I was training to run the Big Sur Marathon (a renewed part of the plan I am starting today) I not only created a soundtrack I even created a motivational music video... and it worked! When I write screenplays or stories I almost always create a "soundtrack" for them as a way of diving more deeply into the story I am creating... Well, starting this morning I'm creating another story...MY story.
So... the soundtrack, as it stands this morning is as follows:
Long Walk Home - Springsteen
Sunday in the Park with George - Mandy Patinkin
Beautiful Day - U2
Where the Streets Have No Name - U2
Move On - Mandy Patinken/Bernadette Peters
Send Your Love - Sting
I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For - U2
Fields of Gold - Sting
Womankind - Annie Lennox
Born to Run - Springsteen
Putting It Together - Mandy Patinkin
With or Without You - U2
Sing - Annie Lennox
Brand New Day - Sting
This will evolve... but this is how I begin my day... how I begin the next six weeks.
Feel free to offer musical suggestions... please.
I am a very sound oriented person, and I always have been. When I was training to run the Big Sur Marathon (a renewed part of the plan I am starting today) I not only created a soundtrack I even created a motivational music video... and it worked! When I write screenplays or stories I almost always create a "soundtrack" for them as a way of diving more deeply into the story I am creating... Well, starting this morning I'm creating another story...MY story.
So... the soundtrack, as it stands this morning is as follows:
Long Walk Home - Springsteen
Sunday in the Park with George - Mandy Patinkin
Beautiful Day - U2
Where the Streets Have No Name - U2
Move On - Mandy Patinken/Bernadette Peters
Send Your Love - Sting
I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For - U2
Fields of Gold - Sting
Womankind - Annie Lennox
Born to Run - Springsteen
Putting It Together - Mandy Patinkin
With or Without You - U2
Sing - Annie Lennox
Brand New Day - Sting
This will evolve... but this is how I begin my day... how I begin the next six weeks.
Feel free to offer musical suggestions... please.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Ready... Set...
For several years I have worked over and over in an attempt to take a specific 6 week period (inspired by Jesus' sojourn in the desert and other symbolic transformational journeys). The problem is that either I have not put them together in a way that makes any sense, or I'm too anal about what I lay down as guidelines and goals and when I stumble I fall and don't get up... or something (like Katrina for one thing) happens.
Like Roseanne Roseannadanna said... "It's always something."
Well, tomorrow morning, fresh on the ending of a year long love affair, I have decided it's time to try once more. As part of my discipline this time, I've decided to blog the entire journey. I'll write about what I'm hoping to make happen. I'll write about my goals for the 6 weeks and I'll document the achievements, and inevitable failings, of each part of the journey. With this regimen in front of me, my thought is that, at the very least, I will FINISH the plan (he says hopefully).
If it really works I'll have a map (and maybe a book) that shows the path that got me there.
See you in the morning.
Like Roseanne Roseannadanna said... "It's always something."
Well, tomorrow morning, fresh on the ending of a year long love affair, I have decided it's time to try once more. As part of my discipline this time, I've decided to blog the entire journey. I'll write about what I'm hoping to make happen. I'll write about my goals for the 6 weeks and I'll document the achievements, and inevitable failings, of each part of the journey. With this regimen in front of me, my thought is that, at the very least, I will FINISH the plan (he says hopefully).
If it really works I'll have a map (and maybe a book) that shows the path that got me there.
See you in the morning.
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